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Sunday, July 16, 2023

On the Floor

On the floor is often a place for exercising. Yoga mats go on the floor and even if it isn't actual yoga that you're practicing, still those exercises have to be done on the floor. Planks, for example. Crunches. Such-like.

 

A while ago I began following a simple exercise routine designed to foster flexibility and movement in aging bodies. All the exercises were so simple that even I could do them. Except for one. And that one alone would constitute a complete exercise program—if one could do it. If one could force oneself to do it. Namely: get on the floor and then move yourself to a standing position.

 

Now I don't remember a lot from my past, but I do remember taking a one-term modern dance class as a gym requirement at university. And I remember sitting on the floor, one leg bent, the other out straight, then swooping gracefully to a standing position with no effort at all. I loved the feeling of power that gave me. I wasn't much for body-based activities, then or ever, but modern dance I liked.

 

So I got on the floor for this current exercise routine, and I tried to get up. Swooping from sitting to standing is no longer one of my options. I roll over to all fours. And wow! Does that hurt the bones of my knees! Given how easily my knees bruise these days, it's hard to believe that I spent thirteen years, more or less, kneeling at daily Mass. On unpadded kneelers. Maybe if I'd kept it up my knees would be tougher now.

 

So there I am on all fours, waiting for inspiration to float me to standing. When that doesn't happen I rest my forearms on a nearby chair and lift one knee off the ground, putting that foot flat on the floor. Leaning with all my strength—and I'm not exaggerating here; I mean ALL my strength—I use my upper body for support as I scramble to get both feet under me and gradually lever myself to a standing position.

 

The exercise routine calls for three or four repetitions of this in each session. Maybe if I'd continued, powered my way through over and over—maybe I'd have built up some leg strength. But I didn't and I didn't.

 

My constant hope now is to avoid finding myself accidentally on the floor and revealing to anyone else the difficulty I have getting up. Where did this come from? Was I really supposed to practice my modern dance levitation from the time I learned it (at 19) through every stage of my life until now? If I had done that, would I not be so embarrassingly weak? Ah, well. Didn't do that either.

 

Good thing there are no really young grandchildren around now. I could join them on the floor to play blocks and games, but then I'd be stuck there until someone brought in a crane.

 

 
 
Copyright © 2023 Ann Tudor
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